You might wonder “I need to get some clarity and direction in my life. But why should I try coaching, over another approach?”. I invited Phoebe, one of my coaching clients, to share her personal experience, insights and what she felt the impact coaching was for her.
Does Phoebe’s old life sound familiar to you?
Six months ago, I felt a bit lost in my life. I had a lot of questions and I wanted to find myself - the real me. Initially I discussed my feelings with friends and most of them would say "don't think too much! That’s just life!". I tried to accept this, but of course my questions still weren’t being answered. I started to doubt myself and started to hate life because I didn’t understand why I was the unlucky one. All these negative emotions, like resentment, anger and sorrow seemed to be coming at me in one go!
I tried a few hobbies, like exercising and painting, to take my mind off how I was feeling. These activities did help for a bit, and I felt happier, relaxed and more energetic. But the feeling didn't last and the questions reappeared. Recently there has been a lot of focus on mindfulness, and a good friend of mine introduced to meditation after I told him about my situation. For me, meditation helps me look for inner peace and calms me down. It helps me better understand my inner self by observing myself. But meditation is not easy to master and it takes practise, which was a struggle for me.
Fortunately, it was around this time that I met Amy who is a coach.
In the process of coaching, I would describe myself as a ‘Kinder Surprise egg’.
Why?
Because the outside of the egg is wrapped in shiny paper - just like I thought I was expected to be by the world around me! But there are sometimes flaws on the wrapping paper, which reminds me of the negative emotions that expectations and pressure can bring.
Amy helped me to open my version of the Kinder Surprise egg with 3 steps:
Through some of the coaching exercises, I began to realise that the packaging was not the real me, or who I wanted to be! The wrapping paper had to be torn off.
Then the next step was to break the outer layer of the egg - the restrictions that I had set up to hold myself back.
Finally! I found the long-awaited ‘gift’ - I found the real me, with a clearer understanding of my aspirations and purpose.
I would advise people to approach the coaching process with an open heart and mind.
I do believe that sometimes we don't need the opinions of others, and everyone has the answers within them. But when societal norms and pressure are sometimes too loud, it may seem like we can barely hear our inner voice. I would advise people to approach the coaching process with an open heart and mind. Through coaching I found and rebuilt myself with a more solid foundation.
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